Positive values for your child

The one thing a parent wishes for is a child with positive values and morals. Here is how you can start instilling these values in your child from young.

Every parent worries about the type of person his or her child will grow up into. Will they be an honest person? What about confidence? The list can go on but one thing remains : how your child turns out to be can very much depend on the type of upbringing he or she will have. And the one person who is responsible for this is yourself.

A lesson in life

There are several ways parents can instil positive values in their child and it is not just a metter of strict discipline and regime. In fact, strict upbringing is perhaps the less advocated method as compared to the scare tactic which is often a bda method of teaching.

Here are several method to instil positive values:

• Help your child understand by talking to them : Start at a young age to talk to your child about the importance of having morals. Share your experience, talk about other people and take the time to properly explain to your child. For example, if you want to talk to your child about the virtues of being diligent, explain to him or her in a languange that they will understand. Complete your teaching with anecdotes that make sense to your child. Guide your child and answer any questions he or she may have.
• Be a good example : The saying "the apple doesn't fall far from the tree" is a prime example when it comes to instilling positive values in your child. If you are teaching your child about patience, losing your top over the smallest issues is not going to help. Your child models your behaviour, after all, their minds are like cameras and they see and record everything that you do.
• Encourage your child : Help instil positive values by giving your child praises. If you ctach your child doing something wrong, tell them so. In extreme situations, you can an should punish them for their bad behaviour. At the same time, why not instruct your child to start practising good behavious such as saving money or being responsible? Each time your child does something good, let him or he know it with rewards or praise.
• Create a perfect environment : No point tecahing your child about being polite if the entire household speaks to each other in a rude manner. Ensure desired settings and wanted values in the family while eliminating undesirable actions. For example, if you want your child to have good manners, make sure you portray this within the family setting. Ask for the entire family to be polite to one another and make sure bad manners get punished to set an example. Remember, when it comes to teaching your child positive values, consistency is the key. Make sure you teach them the same thing over and over again so that they understand exactly what is desired. And lastly, the best way to improve your child's behaviour is by improving your own. So keep to positive values yourself to make sure your child sees how important it is with their own eyes.

By Assoc Prof Dr M Swamenathan, Psychiatrist

Source : Positive Parenting magazine, Vol 1 :2008, www.mypositiveparenting.org

MORE WAYS TO INSTIL POSTIVE VALUES

• Encourage participation as a family in volunteering or community service : This will help your child develop a sense of moral obligation.
• Share emotional times : Talk to your child about your feelings so that he or she may learn to identify their own.
• Show respect for those in authority : This will help discipline your child when it comes to appropriate behaviour

Source : www. parenting.org